Another tip for working with Pediatric specialists

I've had two more thoughts to follow-up on my last post of what I've learned about working with medical specialists. These are things I'm glad I did and found to be effective:

1. I find it very effective to be polite and thankful. Calm on the phone. Courteous in person. If a specialist has gone shown particular attention or fit us into her schedule, I write a nice thank you note on lovely paper. I remember to thank the workhorse doctors on our team at appropriate times: holidays, at times when Danielle is doing well at time-milestones that we've been given, etc. I send pears at Christmas to one doctor who is a particular star---she tells me that it's not necessary, but that her kids gobble up the pears. I send movie tickets as a holiday thank you to nurses in the office who have had to go above-and-beyond as they have cared for my daughter. In short, I acknowledge to our care providers that I know they are "just doing their job", but I recognize it's a tricky job and I try to express that I am thankful.

2. I do PR for my kid, conveying that I believe she's a well child, not a child whose life is compromised. Medical treatment is a sidenote, not her identity.

After my daughter had been hospitalized for the second time, and things were crazy (again), that is when I dressed her up in a princess costume and sent out birth announcements on Halloween. I sent them to my doctors, so that they would have this cute, happy, darling child in their heads when they saw her chart or came across her information---not the image of a baby in a diaper/blanket combo, tethered to wires in a hospital. When I have taken her to appointments, I dress her up in cute outfits, and if the outfit isn't cute enough already, I put a tutu over her pants and that does the trick. My message that I'm conveying is that we are going on with childhood, not sitting home sulking.

My friend Lindsay did something similar with her child when he was in the hospital. She took a marker and wrote all over his bedsheets: I AM WELL! I AM HEALTHY! I AM STRONG! I AM HAPPY! She drew suns and flowers and happy faces.

And that's what I try to convey with my actions to my doctors: My child is strong and happy. She has a great life! Thank you for helping us!